So.. on to MALAWI!
ahhh I had such an amazing time! I got to see all my friends again it was so wonderful and so much fun! I went to my old school for the last week, it was so different than I remember. The classes/people were so.. ghetto. It was strange. But, absolutely nothing has changed in that country, well, apart from my perspective. everyone there said I was quieter than I used to be. Iv learned to keep my mouth shut. In America if you talk its like 'well who does she think she is' mind set. Iv also learned to loose my weirdness and randomness. I was like that in malawi because it was everything to stand out and be different. Whereas here, its looked down on. I see it in my writing as well. if you look at my old posts i was crazy, random and very weird haha and that sorta stuff just came naturally to me. Now, i actually have to try and make these post interesting. sorry if i bore you. Also, life there was so simple, i miss it. Nobody cared what they looked like, nobody cared about the clothes they had, it was just about what makes YOU happy. People choose their battles, because 90% of the county is in poverty people understand from a very young age that life it to short to worry about small things. I just loved all of that and not having to deal with drama, or what people think.
But this, here in America, this is my life now. And i just have to accept the fact that people here aren't like that. And I can still be like that, right? well, its not so easy. I'm very easily influenced and Iv always known that. It was changing me. On the inside and out. My mom said that I was turning into a horrible American Teenager. I didn't see it, or what the big deal was. But now it get it. I was turning into one of those people that could leave the house without makeup and would only shop at Nordstroms. I don't want to change. But it will be an everyday struggle not to.
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